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Compared my long pitch template vs a short one for the same client last month
I had this prospect who kept ghosting me after the first call. So I tried my usual 4 paragraph follow up with all the case studies and bullet points. Nothing. Then I stripped it down to 3 sentences: a thank you, a reminder of one specific problem we talked about, and a direct question about next steps. Sent it on a Wednesday afternoon and got a reply in 2 hours. The long one probably felt like homework. The short one felt like a text from a friend. Has anyone else had better luck with super short follow ups over the detailed ones?
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corap6112d ago
I gotta push back a little on "fewer words almost always wins." I think it really depends on where you are in the sales process. The short follow up works great after the first call, like you said, because you're just keeping the conversation warm. But later on, say when you're sending a proposal or a case study that proves you can solve their exact problem, a little more detail can actually help seal the deal. The key is matching the message to the moment. Early on it's about being human and easy to talk to. Later it's about showing you've done your homework and you know what you're talking about. So I wouldn't toss the long template entirely, just save it for when the short one isn't enough anymore.
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Yeah fewer words almost always wins. People don't want to read a novel when they're busy.
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sam_cooper12d ago
Yeah "fewer words almost always wins" right up until you send a five word email and the guy writes back "what's your pricing again?" because you didn't include enough context. In my experience the sweet spot is somewhere between a tweet and a ransom note. People need just enough info to make a decision without dozing off. I've definitely sent stuff that was too short and just ended up wasting everyone's time with back and forth clarifying. So maybe "fewer words usually wins" is more like the real deal.
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